10 Steps to Build Your Self-Esteem
When your self-esteem is low it can have a negative effect on virtually every part of your body, inside and out. From feeling down, to having trouble in your relationships, to questioning your confidence in how you do your job, straight through to your physical health, self-esteem plays a part in every one of those roles. If your self-esteem isn’t all it could be, you could be cheating yourself on having a better life, when you are the one who can do something about it to change things.
Signs of low self-esteem
What are some symptoms of low-esteem? See below:
- Being really critical of yourself
- Focusing on the negatives in your life
- Comparing yourself to others
- Not accepting compliments
- Negative self-talk
- Poor performance in school
- Being bullied
- Neglecting oneself
- Suffering from abuse – verbal or otherwise
- Feeling like you’re the odd one out
Identify What’s Bothering You
One way to improve self-esteem is try to think of the situations that can deal a blow to your ego. Is it a presentation at work or school that you may not feel ready for? Is it a crisis taking place at home for which some reason you are blaming yourself? Have you just lost your job, or broken off a long-term relationship?
These are all troubling situations, but they are not all your fault. Think about the ideas you just came up with. Explain to yourself, even out loud if it helps, how you interpret the situation and why you think they are weighing you down with negative feelings. When working on building self-esteem, try to figure out if your feelings are based on fact and reality, or if just maybe, you may be pushing the envelope a little, letting yourself believe some irrational thoughts that are arousing negative thoughts, thoughts that don’t belong to you. Then try to replace the negative thoughts with more constructive ones.
Steps to improve low self-esteem
- Positive self-talk
- Don’t compare yourself to others
- Don’t try to change. Be happy with who you are.
- Don’t beat yourself up when you make a mistake
- Do things that you enjoy.
- Celebrate the small stuff
- Surround yourself with supportive people
- Be kind to others
- Set realistic expectations
In a nutshell, improving self-esteem is all about treating yourself the way you deserve to be treated, using any or all of the methods above. The key is to tackle the small ones first. Exercise is an easy one to start with. Just take a walk every day, and pretty soon you’ll be missing the days when you have to skip it.
With each boost of self-esteem you gain, you’ll be able to push yourself that much further. Don’t tell yourself that you didn’t achieve something because you weren’t good enough. Acknowledge what you took on and maybe pay yourself on the back for going for the big fish, even if he did get away. This time.
Most of all, avoid negative self-talk. Don’t ever undervalue yourself, put yourself down or put yourself down to others, even in jest. Soon others will begin to believe it, and it will be even harder to pull yourself up.