Is an Abusive Personality Genetic? There are many articles written on the subject of abusive personalities, most of which explore the possibility that the trait of abuse may be a genetic one. Just like a predisposition to addiction, this theory hinges on certain traits being passed from parent to offspring and is not based on environmental factors. Most of these …
Tolerating Abusive Behavior and the Role of Self-Esteem
Tolerating Abusive Behavior and the Role of Self-Esteem Low self-esteem is a serious issue for those in abusive relationships. Abuse reinforces low self-esteem and hampers your ability to build and maintain healthy relationships. Chances are that not believing in yourself, or not valuing yourself enough, has something to do with how you can end up in an abusive relationship in …
Doing for Others Helps You, Too
Doing for Others Helps You, Too When things have got you down, one of the best things you can do for yourself is to volunteer your time to help others. Volunteers tend to have a higher self-esteem than their counterparts, as well as a healthier psychological sense of well-being and a happier outlook on the world as well. As your …
You Don’t Have to Be a People-Pleaser
You Don’t Have to Be a People-Pleaser Everyone wants to be liked, and linked to that is the tendency to want please others to gain their admiration. There is nothing wrong with wanting to please people. It can make you a popular person and someone whom people would respect and like to have around. But wanting to please them for …
Don’t Give in to Guilty Feelings
Don’t Give in to Guilty Feelings When you feel guilty, you are often experiencing a false or inappropriate sense of responsibility for something that has gone wrong. You may have magnified what you did and took personal responsibility for “whatever.” Instead of taking time to understand your role in the situation, you may have been unrealistic and automatically believed that …
What Would Jesus Do to Help Someone Learn Not to be Constantly Defensive of, or Insensitive to Others?
What Would Jesus Do to Help Someone Learn Not to be Constantly Defensive of, or Insensitive to Others? Helping someone learn how not to be constantly defensive of, or insensitive to others isn’t a problem that can be fixed overnight. These are behaviors that have developed over years and years of being conditioned to treat others a certain way, especially …
What Would Jesus Do to Help Those Who Have Trouble with Empathy?
What Would Jesus Do to Help Those Who Have Trouble with Empathy? There is a well-known saying that you don’t know what another person’s life is like until you, “walk a mile in their shoes.” In short, this is what empathy is. It helps us understand others from their own perspectives; it means having the capacity to interpret another’s feelings …
People Pleasers: The Problems With Pleasing
People Pleasers: The Problems With Pleasing From early childhood, you begin to learn that you can earn the validation you crave by pleasing your parents, caretakers or others. As you mature, you take that skill with you, having realized that you feel better about yourself when others express positive comments about you. The problem with relying on others to get …
Altruism and Self-Love
Altruism and Self-Love Altruism is tantamount to selflessness. While altruism sounds like the exact opposite of the term self-love, they are really quite similar, in concept. Without first learning to master self-love, you will never be able to be truly altruistic. The simple definition of altruism is “the behavior that shows a desire to help other people, a lack of …
Shame vs Guilt: Transcending Shame
Shame vs Guilt: Transcending Shame Many people use the words shame and guilt interchangeably, but they actually refer to different experiences. Guilt and shame do sometimes go hand in hand; the same experience may give rise to both feelings, but guilt reflects how we feel about ourselves and shame involves an awareness that our actions have injured someone else. In …
