The Essentials of Building Your Self-Confidence
Self-confidence is all about feeling worthwhile in the world. In order to feel worthwhile, you need to build up your self-esteem. Believing in yourself and not relying on the approval of others will help you let go of the negative feelings or thoughts you have internalized, feelings that may be countering your sense of self-worth.
Increasing your self-confidence includes confronting the fears that you face and interpreting whether they represent a real or perceived threat. If you determine that the threat is perceived, you can start to work on filtering out what is causing your fear or negative emotions. Then, by minimizing or eliminating the internal negativity that is causing your initial fear, you increase your self-confidence.
Face Your Fears
By facing your fears, you will discover that even if you fail, the world does not end. But it is constantly changing; if you make up your mind to accept life on life’s terms and “roll with it,” so to speak, you can easily boost your self-confidence.
Negative emotions build up over time as you rely on approval from others for your self-confidence. When that approval doesn’t come, you personalize the negative response, which results in you taking constant stabs at your own self-esteem. Your self-worth is diminished, and then, of course, you compromise your self-confidence.
Get out in the World
A sure way to bolster your self-esteem is by being out in the world, taking in as many different experiences as you can. Some will cause anxiety, but as you encounter and process them again and again, you will slowly be able to prevent them from becoming triggers for your fear and anxiety. You may learn to tell yourself that you have been through similar situations and have come out of the other side successfully. This helps you gain courage and confidence with every experience.
Low self-esteem can be ingrained during childhood as you learn to get attention by pleasing your parents. This behavior carries over into adulthood. When you don’t get approval from others, and then hold onto those negative feelings every time you encounter them, you damage your self-esteem even more and convince yourself that you have low self worth.
You need to remember that the world is not as interested in you as you might like to think. People have their own lives to think about as they also worry that the whole world is watching them. They are not monitoring what you do wrong or when you fail. Realizing that you are not under all of the scrutiny you think you are will be a relief, because then you can let go of the anxiety over the thought that everyone is watching your every move, waiting for you to fail.
Failure Is Not Always Bad
Remember that every time you fail, you get more comfortable with the experience. As you come to realize that your failures will not result in terrible circumstances every single time, you will be able to handle things that would have been very difficult to deal with just a few years back. Enduring a failure can also instigate an exhilarating feeling because even though you failed, at least you took the chance.
Giving yourself the sense of worth that allows you to take that chance takes courage and determination.
Building your self-confidence does not happen overnight. It takes practice, and you are the only one who can do it. But little by little, with every fear you conquer, you increase your self-esteem and self worth.
In a short amount of time, you will begin to enjoy an enriching self-confidence that helps you feel you can meet the world on its terms and accept what happens, good or bad, without feeling that you are the cause of anything that goes wrong.