Who’s Number One?
Of course, YOU are number one! You should never think that someone else is better than you are. You just need to teach yourself how to see the wonderful things that are inside you.
You Were Number One from Day One!
When you were born, you didn’t even know that you considered yourself number one. Everything you needed was given to you without you ever having to ask. As you grew, however, you began to realize that things you needed, like love and attention, were not always at the ready for you. This was the first time your self-esteem suffered from negative feedback. You needed to develop a method to get the attention, love, and other things you wanted or needed when you wanted them.
Discovering the Benefits of People-Pleasing
This was the beginning of your development as a people-pleaser. As time passed, you figured out that you could often get what you wanted from people by pleasing them. This reaction would bolster your self-esteem and make you feel worthwhile in the world.
Then there was the flip side. When you tried to please someone and did not get the positive reaction you were seeking, you felt hurt. As you continued with your people-pleasing efforts, every time they did not work, you took the negative feedback as a fault of yours, when it was probably just the situation in general. As these negative feelings collected in your mind, they slowly brought your feelings of self-worth lower and lower.
As an adult, you have probably accepted the mistruth that the many negative thoughts you have collected over the years are true. You have likely convinced yourself that you are second-best to all the people you tried to please who did not give you the validation you were seeking.
Bringing Yourself Back
Now is the time to reverse that pattern and bring yourself back to believing that you are number one! You owe it to yourself to celebrate who you are to the fullest.
The very first thing you need to do is concentrate on eliminating the thought that the negative feelings you have collected and held onto for all of these years are due to some fault or imperfection of your own. You need to believe that the negative experiences you had in life, were just that — negative, nothing more. Everyone experiences them, and the ones you experienced do not make you a lesser person for it.
Going forward, you need to develop a way to deflect future negative feedback that comes your way. The more negative feelings you eliminate and the more you are able to deflect any new negative feedback that is coming your way, the more you will be able to improve your self-esteem and restore your feelings of worth.
As you feel more worthwhile, you are on your way back to feeling like you are the number one positive influence in your own life, and you will be better able to shine your light and be a positive influence for others who know you.